- Yes.. but now you know why?!
Men & women both exhibit a particular behavior. Women are believed to be crying often & easily whereas men seldom cry. This has always been a mystery & a topic of debate. Some South Asian advertisements with a campaign named, “Larkay rotay nahi” have tried to explain this behavior as an outcome of brought up. But neuroscience has addressed these distinct behaviors of men & women by answering, “Why women respond differently in emotions than men?”
Brain studies have shown slight differences in most areas of brains pertaining to men & women. The differences explain their stereotypical behaviors. Men & women both experience negative emotions but expressions of those emotions are different in these physiologically different genders. If neural activity is compared among them, WOMEN REVAMP NEGATIVE FEELINGS TO POSITIVE ONES. HOWEVER, MEN REACTS BY GOING MUTE.
Question arises, “How this justifies the fact, Women cry often when compared to men?” One study reports,”Women shed tears as much as 8 times more often than men. Also the duration of crying is 3 times longer when compared to men.” Endocrinological distinctions provide clear evidences to these varying behaviors. Women have higher levels of hormone called prolactin, located in pituitary gland & functions to produce tears. Men have higher levels of testosterone which limits tears production. Surprisingly, science does not take the complete credit of these distinct behaviors, social & cultural factors also tend to play their roles. Females brought up in pampered environment have actively playing prolactin responsible for delicacy in them. However, males brought up in Chauvinist – male dominant – environment tend to have fueled testosterones which result in over ruling in men. Hence, both genders must understand each others biological differences & then learn to treat nicely.
Women can now get rid of the title, “You are a cry baby!” You are gifted with a stress releasing mechanism. Do not give up on your this lovely delicacy ladies.
We have all have those days… The bad days! We all have crap going through our lives. It’s okay. It’s life! You are not the one & only facing it alone. Let’s keep ourselves going & let’s face it.
When bad days come, you feel like there is never going to be a tomorrow. Depression takes over so much of who you are & what you want to say & do. Let’s not let this depression take over us. Let’s fight it. So here are some tips & tricks to get over a bad day:
- Figure out what it is that is actually bothering you.
For some people it may be like this specific thing happened & it completely ruined my mood. Now I don’t want to talk to anyone or do anything. For other people there may be a fight with somebody or maybe a small issue that went down, that you are exploding in your mind. And in reality there is nothing deeper & bigger that is actually going on that is affecting your mood.
This may be a little bit confusing. Sometimes when I have an issue going on & I have not talked about it to anybody. Someone does a little thing & I end up bursting all my anger over that person & then I get even more upset, ending up being in an even more horrible mood, not even knowing what the cause is.
So the first thing you need to do is realizing what the real issue is. Do not take it out on the other people because some other people are the reason to it.
- Once you realize what the issue is, you should write it down or talk about it to someone you trust, a person who is not biased, will listen to you & will not judge you.
Some people may not have that person in their lives. If you do not have someone like that, do not worry, it’s okay! Most people do not have such a person & one day life will give you a person you can open up to. In such a case, I recommend sitting down & writing it out in a diary, writing whatever you are feeling, just to get it out!
If you keep it all bottled up inside, you will end up being crazy. We have all had bad days before & you need to let it out somehow, either you are speaking about it to someone, whether you are writing it down exactly how you feel with no hesitations because letting it out will help immensely.
- Once you let it out or you have talked about it, you need to “Let It Go!”
I understand in certain scenarios & areas, some things cannot be let go. You need to talk about it. Whether it is a fight or an issue that needs to be resolved. One thing that we all need to realize is that some of us get so lost in our own problems that we forget about everything else.
We are living on planet floating in a huge space & you are a little tiny spec of a person. This might not be the nicest way to put it all together, but guess what? We are all living on this huge earth. Our tiny little problems are nothing, no matter what we do, no matter what we think about, it is not going to change the sun coming up in the morning or the moon coming out at night & the earth from keep spinning.
One thing that people do not realize that the stress & anxiety can consume you. Over time it can completely change you as a person. If you are not letting the stuff out & if you are not talking about it to somebody or if you are not asking someone for help, if you are not writing it down & just letting it go. You are then going to hold on to all of these issues & all of the pain & it is going to keep building up inside of you.
Let’s take an example; Think about your oldest favourite song. That one song can remind you of someone or something, the moment of time when you first heard it. No matter how much time passes, you know all the lyrics & all the words & if it randomly comes on 5 years later. Will that not take you to that moment, that thing or to that person?
If you do, then this is just an example of how all of your emotions are deep down inside of you & if you are not letting everything go, it just builds up inside you. So all the hatred, all the anger, all the anxiety, all the depression, everything is being stuffed inside of you, waiting to burst out.
One little switch of your crazy little mind telling you “OMG! This happened. Now the world is over. I am miserable. I am so depressed etc.” Guess what… That is never ever going to stop anything.
By letting it go you need to realize that you do not need to hold on to this anger. There is no reason for you to keep it inside of you. And you will realize at some point that nothing that you are holding on to is worth it.
The key to living a happy & peaceful life is never going to happen by changing things on the outside. It is all about working on the inside & then everything will kind of come together. I know some people are still very narrow minded with the fact that they think each & everything, I mean every car, every luxury, every this, every that & then everything in life is going to be so perfect & better. Let me be the person to tell you that, yes I have a lot of crap, way too much stuff, way too many luxuries but this does not solve any…any…any inner problem that I have ever had. I still have bad days! It is not the material things that is going to make you happy, it is not anything that you are going to change on the outside & that will make you feel better. Just think of how many times you have said “Oh, if I would just get a big house or a bigger car & everything will be better on the inside.” But guess what? It won’t be better. It is not the outside world that is going to help you, only you working on yourself.
Next thing you need to do is, distract yourself from everything that is going on. Let’s say, what I do is, I listen to music, I write or I just pray for hours & that is my therapy. Just letting everything go. Getting consumed with the music, writing or prayers & this is something that helps me to get through a bad day.
Also you can eat some chocolates, ice-cream & something sweet. If available, you should eat dark chocolate. It helps a lot. Chocolates & sweet things help improve the mood. This is something I have personally observed. Sweets increase the production of certain chemicals in the brain that brings on the feelings of pleasure & act as anti-depressant.
When you are going through something & you are having a really hard time. You can make yourself feel better is by helping other people get through their problems. Helping others will make you feel better & have inner peace.
Other ways you can distract yourself is by having some quiet time, reading a book, taking a warm bath, taking a nap, driving yourself somewhere, getting some quite time for you & yourself to let go all of your problems & do not think about it & it will help calm you down. Whatsoever helps you distract yourself better, do that! In short, take out some time for yourself, pamper yourself. Do something that you would not normally do on an everyday basis & take a little extra time. After all we are fragile, we are human beings, we have feelings, we have emotions & we have so many things that are going on every single day. There are so many horrible things that happen to us & those things can literally take over us. The goal is to be happy & peaceful, to have peace of mind. It’s all about being okay & contended with who you are. We need to understand that everyone has bad days. Life is a roller coaster, there are ups & downs. Some days are better than the others.
“Just because today is a terrible day doesn’t mean tomorrow might not be the best day of your entire life. You just have to wake up & get there.”
We all have crap going on in our life, every single human being faces something on a day to day basis & you need to realize you are not alone. Everybody is in this together, whether you realize it or not. Just know that it will get better, whatever you are going through. You do not realize how much power you have all within yourself. It is just all about how you as a person get through all of the crap happening in your life.
We all want to be happy, we all want to live a peaceful life & all you need to do is to work on your inner self.
“You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life!”
Here we bring the Tumblr inspired do it yourself way to stay positive. All you need to do is, create a box storage jar where if something good happens to you, you can write it down & put it in. That way at the end of the year you can open it up & see all the good things that happened to you. You can get a jar, shoe box, tissue box or use anything you like. Get some stickers that you like or make your own cute little quote stickers to stick on the jar. The reason for decorating the jar is to make it look pretty & that every time you look at it, it will put you in a good mood.
The reason for doing this is a lot of good things happen & you are excited about it & happy about life. And then one bad thing happens & it often shuts you down & descends your mood & you tend to forget all the good things that happened to you.
When something good happens to you, you can quickly write it down & put it in the jar. If you are having a harder time & you want to go from a month to month you can even do that.
The best way to change your mood during bad times is to do stuff that reminds you of all the good old days that you have had. Doing this can actually help you to remember & have your memories saved forever. It is a way to remind you that bad things happen to everyone. Times can be really really hard. That there is good & little good things do matter the most.
“Enjoy the little things in life… For one day you’ll look back & realize they were big things.”
Not just this… You can even write your dreams, goals & wishes. So that months from now when you open the jar/box you should know that back in the days “I wanted to do this with my life & I have accomplished … things.” Your accomplishments will obviously make you happy.
Everyone has ups & downs in their lives. If you try to focus on what’s positive in your life & what’s good in your life you will be okay. Anyone who needs more positivity in their life or something that may help to keep their mind off should definitely do this.
You don’t need to wait the whole year. You can even stick to it completely & try for 2-3 weeks. Write about the good things that happened to you & if you are having a bad day just open the jar & look at all the positive things & this will help bring a smile to your face & will make you bad day better.
Remember, if you lead out positive energy then positive things will happen to you. If you are not happy the way your life is going then be sure it’s time to make some changes. This little jar won’t solve the world’s problems but if this can help you be a better person then surely go for it. Because we need to start from ourselves.
“May you be happy always & enjoy the little things!”